Stay
by jokergirl94
Summary: Would someone be there for him when he needed it? Set during "The End" 5x04 Sick!Suicidal!Future!Dean Druggie!Cas AU Destiel Oneshot


**Disclaimer: Still don't own or profit from this. **

**A/N: So how about this another one shot thought up in Chemistry. Hope you like it! Also this will be AU seeing as I haven't seen this episode in forever and this just popped into mind. **

**Summary: Would someone be there for him when he needed it? Set during "The End" 5x04 Sick!Suicidal!Future!Dean Druggie!Cas AU Destiel **

SPN SPN SPN

"Have you seen Dean? We're out of toilet paper again." Chuck asked coming into the mess hall and landing on the bench next to Risa who was devouring her oatmeal.

"I haven't seen him since the last mission. Saw him head to his cabin with a case of beer, pack of cigs and a couple of pornos. I can take a hint." She answered spitting oatmeal clumps across the table as she spoke.

"The last mission was nearly a week ago! And you're saying that nobody has heard from him since?" The former prophet and present camp organizer exclaimed, "Doesn't that bother you at all?"

"Nope not really." Risa replied after taking a minute to think, "If it bothers you so much go ask group orgy over there." She said pointing with her spoon towards Cas who was surrounded by some of the civilians they had rescued on their last trip into town before going back to her oatmeal that boasted a sliced strawberry.

"Fine I will." Chuck huffed and stomped off towards Castiel who was looking rather stress free something that he himself hadn't felt in years.

"Castiel a word please?" Chuck asked the former angel and was surprised to see he was actually sober for the time being.

"What can I help you with?" Cas asked mellowed but not high as he came to stand in front of the much shorter man.

"Where's Dean? He hasn't been seen since the last mission and we are out of toilet paper. We need to go back to town."

"Chuck you know what time of year it is. He has probably been on a weeklong bender. The man does enough for us I think he can take a couple of days off every now and again," Cas suggested before adding, "maybe I should drop by and give him some of my weed. It might help him. I know it helps me."

Chuck shook his head and knowing he wouldn't be getting any help. His mother always told him if you want something done right do it yourself, "Never mind. I'll go talk to him myself."

He turned to leave but was stopped by a hand on his shoulder, "Since you're going that way," Cas said reaching into his jean pocket and pulled out a rolled joint, "give this to him. Tell him it's a gift."

He grabbed the joint and quickly shoved it into his pocket before finally leaving the stuffy hall and stepping into the fresh May air. It was the only thing he enjoyed about the apocalypse. Now everything was cleaner. In fact their camp was the only place he knew of that had working vehicles and electricity, although it was spotty at best.

"Damn it." In his daydreaming he hadn't seen the mud puddle in the middle of camp and had gotten his last pair of clean socks full of the manure smelling mud.

Dragging his shoe across the grass in hopes of getting the mud off he finally reached Dean's door and started pounding on it, "Come on Dean! I need to talk to you."

Stopping his incessant pounding he stuck his ear against the door and couldn't hear any movement which was unusual for the younger man. Usually whenever Dean had a free moment from running the camp he was with a woman or practicing his fighting or teaching firearms lessons. Now that he thought about it he really didn't do much that didn't involve the camp.

"Come on Dean I have some important things to discuss with you." He yelled again pounding on the door but afraid to go inside.

"Can't get him either?"

Turning around he found Garth standing at the bottom of the rotten wood stairs that led to the porch he was currently standing on, "You've been looking too?"

"Every day. Cracked another one of Bobby's codes and I think I know where another one of his stashes are." Garth replied gently moving Bobby's old hat from his head to readjust his hair which he had stopped cutting and was starting to grow into a pony tail.

It was silent before Chuck finally asked the question they were both thinking, "You don't think he has finally done it?"

It had been relatively soon after the camp had started and nobody had heard from Winchester for a couple of days and had assumed the Croats got him when he stumbled into camp and collapsed. Luckily they had had a Doctor with them at the time that had quickly looked over the man before diagnosing a drug overdose and quickly rushed him to the medical room and forced charcoal down his throat and successfully clearing his stomach of the drugs.

After Dean had woken up four days later he was on suicide watch for a month after. When he was released from the make shift hospital he left like nothing happened and went about his everyday normal business. But since then everyone looked at him differently and knew he was still reckless and suicidal. He was always throwing himself in to dangerous spots in missions and taking all the unnecessary risks he could.

"It's the anniversary of Sam saying Yes. I wouldn't put it passed him." Garth answered coming up the steps careful of the rotten away areas as rain started to lightly sprinkle.

"I guess we had better check on him huh?"

"After you." Garth agreed waving towards the door.

Chuck took a deep breath before gently pushing on the door knob and opening the door. He was surprised that it was actually unlocked and that nothing had flown out at him yet. Stepping into the cabin he was stopped by the stench of vomit, shit and piss. It was overwhelming and he knew something was wrong right away.

"Garth I think you should get Cas." He whispered looking straight ahead as he tried to will himself to take another step forward.

He didn't hear the door close behind him but took another step into the room as the stench grew heavier. He had made it almost to the living room when he caught movement out of the corner of his eye and pulled out his little switch blade (the only weapon Dean trusted him with) and turned to the threat only to drop the knife to his side when he saw what it was.

Dean was lying on the floor of the kitchen surrounded by crushed beer cans and his old pack of cigarettes around him. There were a couple of puddles of vomit on the floor around him and some smeared across his baggy grey t-shirt. The boy was covered in sweat and his jeans were wet near the crotch and a puddle was forming around him.

"Shit!" Chuck yelled skidding across the floor towards Dean and started shaking him by his shoulder trying to wake him up, "wake up. Come on we need you. Don't you dare check out on me."

SPN SPN SPN

Garth had been right behind Chuck when he opened the door and smelt all the human waste and he nearly gagged. This wasn't good.

"Garth I think you should get Cas." He barely heard the whisper but didn't hesitate to follow the order.

Running from the cabin he took off down the stairs and tore across the courtyard catching the attention of the guards on duty around the perimeter of the camp.

"Fitzgerald! What's flown up your ass?" One of the younger men yelled from his spot on the wall.

"Where's Castiel?" He yelled only pausing to catch his breath.

"Haven't seen Wings since he went to Breakfast."

Nodding in reply he took off towards the mess hall and was relieved when the first person he saw was the angel. Rushing over he grabbed the blue eyed man by the sleeve and pulled him towards the door.

"Garth what is this about? I'm not schedule to help with fighting tactics until this afternoon?" Cas argued as he was pulled by his long sleeved tee out of the building and into the steadily falling rain.

"Not about fighting tactics. Something's wrong with Dean."

"Why didn't you fucking say that sooner?" Cas yelled as he started in a dead sprint passed the hunter and towards the head cabin.

SPN SPN SPN

"Dean? Dean can you hear me?" Chuck asked frantically as he hit Dean on the cheeks. Moving down he felt for a pulse and was happy when he found one, albeit it was fluttering like a butterfly.

Dean murmured something before his throat started moving convulsively and quickly Chuck moved the young man on his side as bile spilled from the mouth.

Rubbing his back he asked, "What was that?"

"S'mmy. I want Sammy."

Shit. How do you reply to that?

Before he could say anything the door behind him swung open and stuck itself in the wood wall of the old building and was pushed aside by the Angel.

"Dean. Dean what did you do know?" Cas asked feeling for any hints that might lead to what was leaving Dean in this condition but was coming up with nothing, "Did he say anything while I was gone?" He asked turning to Chuck who was getting up and wiping some vomit from his pants.

"He wants Sammy."

Castiel finished looking over his friend, secret lover, before stating, "Open the bed. I'm gonna move him there. Garth grab some clean clothes and wet rags for me." Both men started on their jobs while Cas gently picked up Dean noticing that any weight he had was simply muscle and strong tendon. There was nothing else to him, except the bones he could feel poking through his shirt.

"It's ok baby. I got you. I'll fix you up." Cas whispered as he carried Dean like a toddler to the full size bed he was lucky enough to have and waited while Chuck finished opening it.

"I need to find Sammy. Dad's gonna kill me I gotta find Sammy. It's my job to watch Sammy." Dean yelled shaking in Cas's arms.

"I got the wet rags and clean clothes."

All three men quickly went to work on cleaning their fallen leader and finished as they finally dressed him in a pair of worn boxers before covering him up under the holey duvet that Dean had saved from before the Croats. It had belonged to Bobby.

"I got it from here guys. " Cas said quietly so as to not wake Dean.

"Do you need anything?"

"Just make sure that all posts are taken care of and if it isn't too much trouble bring food here during meals. I need to eat and so does Dean and I don't plan on leaving his side until he can get out of bed."

"On it Wings."

SPN SPN SPN

It was nightfall before Dean started to move again and Cas could smell fresh urine with the movement, "Never thought I would have to clean up your messes kiddo." He quietly went about pulling the blanket away and changing the boxers and moving Dean to the couch while he soaked the sheets in the tub along with his duvet.

Moving to the couch where the younger man was starting to squirm Cas came up behind him and cuddled him to keep him warm believing the fever Dean had was probably making him feel chills instead of the heat he was really putting out.

Just as he got settled there was a knock at the door, "Cas we have food."

"Come on in." Cas yelled as he stood up gently easing Dean back on to the worn sofa.

"We weren't sure what to get but we managed to get Jodie to scrounge up some canned chicken soup." Chuck spoke up carrying the steaming bowl into the living room.

"Sad to say but you get the regular bowl of rice and venison, same as the rest of us." Garth added handing over the wrapped plate to the former angel.

Cas started in on his meal hungry since he didn't get to eat any of his meals today and he was famished, "Thanks for bring the food by guys."

"No problem." Garth answered opening his mouth to add something more but quickly closed his mouth.

"What can I help you with Garth?" Cas asked annoyed at his disruption but decided to see what was troubling his friend.

"It's just- you don't think- Is he gonna be alright?"

"Why wouldn't he be?" He asked setting the plate down next to Dean's bowl on the floor before stepping forward with a fierce glare in his eye, "Is there something you know that you're not telling me?"

"NO! It's just you don't think he took something again do you?"

The angel had to laugh, more out of bitterness then humor. Of course everyone would assume Dean had tried to kill himself again it wasn't a secret that their leader was suicidal and depressed even on the best of days, "He has been working his ass day in and day out to protect everyone. Never stopped to treat a wound, went on missions puking his guts out from food poisoning. Now his dumbass moves caught up with him and he has the flu."

"Are you serious? It looks like he's dying." Chuck exclaimed and took another look at Dean who was still shivering and completely out of it on the couch.

"He has always been like that. Even before this whole shit storm happened. Sam would always leave me in charge of him when he was sick." Cas reminisced seemingly forgetting his company and remembering his time with the two brothers who had treated him more like family then any of the Angels in heaven.

Seeing their friend seeming to drift away, "We'll be back in the morning let us know if you need anything else."

Cas nodded and retreated back to his seat next to Dean and listened to the door close behind the other hunters.

"Hey baby what do you say we get you something to eat? Looks like you could use a little food." He whispered into the delicate ear as he pulled Dean into a sitting position and was leaning against him. Spooning a couple chunks of vegetables and some broth from the bowl he stuck the spoon to Dean's mouth, "Come on Dean just a couple of spoonfuls and you can go back to sleep just wake up for a little bit."

Dean opened his eyes and revealed hazy, forest green eyes that crossed over his nose so he could see the offending object, "Noooo."

"Just a couple of spoonfuls for me. You were passed out on the floor for who knows how long and your last meal was probably a six pack of beer and cigs. Just do this for me."

Turning his head on Cas's shoulder he looked at his angel and saw the sincerity in his eyes and gently pulled his lips apart and let the food in.

"Thank you Dean."

SPN SPN SPN

He wasn't sure when he fell asleep but he was gently awoken by a soft murmuring in his ear. Opening his eyes he saw Dean had managed to wiggle his way up his side and was lying closer to his head.

Carefully moving so as not to throw either one of them off the couch he sat up and hit the lamp checking for electricity and was happy when he got the dim glow of the old light bulb. Shifting again so he could see Dean he was surprised when the hunter clung to him and his eyes flew open in search of him.

"Shh Dean I'm right here. Just relax." He soothed rubbing his shoulder and getting Dean to lean against him again and was happy to feel the fever was down. Hopefully this was a hint that the sickness was coming to an end.

"Cassie I'm cold." Dean whined cracking his eyes open just enough to see who he was talking too.

Looking out the window he could see the starts of a sun rise, "Let me see if the quilt is dry yet. If it is we can get you back to bed."

Before he could finish replying Dean was already asleep as if the couple seconds of awareness completely wore him out. Running to the bathroom he reached for the duvet hanging over the shower curtain rod and was happy to feel that it was dry and moving to feel the sheets they were dry as well. He quickly made the bed and walked over to the couch and gently picked his young lover up and carried him to the bed.

Tucking him in he was about to turn away to turn the light off when he felt a weak grasp on his wrist, "Stay. Don't leave too."

Brushing a sweaty bang away from the pale freckled face," I'm not going anywhere Dean. I'm not going anywhere."

SPN SPN SPN

"Think we should knock?" Garth asked coming up the front steps to the cabin closely followed by Chuck both sets of arms full with food and supplies that Jodie insisted they bring. Risa was still on the outs with Dean and didn't care what happened.

"Nah it should be fine. Dean's probably sleeping again and Cas is probably smoking a joint or something. Just go in." Chuck answered shuffling the heavy quilt in his arms.

Opening the door both men walked in and set the supplies on the table and started to walk towards the couch where they had last seen the two men but were surprised to see they weren't there. Scanning the room they finally landed on the bed where Dean was wrapped in the arms of Cas both men deep in sleep.

"So um what do we do?" Chuck asked backing out of the room embarrassed at finding his two friends in such a compromising position.

"Let's go. They'll find the stuff." Garth answered and pushed both of them out the front door quietly closing the door behind him.

SPN SPN SPN

Cas stretched and opened his eyes loving that he was looking at the familiar inside of Dean's cabin. He hadn't been here in awhile not overnight at least. Not since they had gotten into an argument about how much work Dean was doing and the effect it was having on his health. Looking over he caught sight of the sleeping face next to him and gently kissed him on the forehead pleased to feel that the fever had broken.

"Good morning. I'll go get you some breakfast."

Pulling the blanket from him he felt the cold morning breeze across his bare chest and legs and he quickly covered Dean up again so he wouldn't get cold. Walking across the rough floor he spotted the kitchen table full of supplies. Sorting through them he found another blanket and wrapped himself in it as he went through the food and was happy to find some oatmeal that was still slightly warm sitting behind a cup of coffee.

Walking back to bed he quickly slid in careful not to spill breakfast and pulled the blanket over them in addition to the other one, "Look what I've got. Breakfast in bed. We haven't done this in awhile." Cas spoke up and was rewarded with a two green eyes peeking open and watching him as he took a sip of coffee.

Without even asking for help Cas helped Dean lean up against the wall and made sure the pillows were cushioning his back, "We got some oatmeal. You should try and eat some. I know you aren't hungry but you need your strength so you can get better."

Dean pulled the bowl close to him and slowly raised a shaky hand to the spoon and weakly moved the spoon to his mouth the glob of hot cereal teetering dangerously on the shaking spoon before it dropped to the blankets.

"Here let me help you." Cas offered setting aside his own breakfast and spoon fed him a couple more spoonfuls until the bowl was weakly pushed away, "I'm still not happy with you not eating a lot but I can deal with this." He was rewarded with the sound of soft snoring coming from his side and gently pulled his sleeping boyfriend closer and drank his coffee while watching the wildlife through the window.

SPN SPN SPN

It was just afternoon and Cas had just stepped back into the cabin after running to his own for a new set of clothes and to make sure his posts were covered when he spotted Dean sitting on the edge of the bed shakily tying his boots.

"What are you doing?" He asked dropping his bag and gun to the floor by the door before taking a step forward.

"I've got work to do. This camp depends on me. I have had my time to mourn and have a damn pity party but now I've got to get my ass in gear and do my job." Dean commanded gruffly from the bed.

"You're still sick Dean! You can't eat a full meal and you haven't walked anywhere on your own for nearly a week. Get back in bed and rest for awhile if you go back out in the field those damn Croats will get you faster than you can say Apocalypse. Is that what you want?"

"Maybe it is. What are you going to do about it?" Dean threatened standing up on wobbly legs and leaning against the wall for support.

"Is that really how you feel?" Cas whispered standing watching his lover, his Dean, struggle with himself.

"I don't have anything else to look forward too. I've let everyone around me down all I do is disappoint them." Dean dejectedly answered and leaned forward to retrieve his gun and nearly fell forward before catching himself on the door jamb.

"Really? You have nothing else to look forward too? I thought we had something Dean. I guess not. Fine you ass, work yourself to death or kill yourself I don't care." Cas yelled sending one last glare to the struggling man and stormed out the door grabbing his bag and gun on his way out. He was in between cabins when he heard the door behind him slam open.

"Cas!".

He spun around just in time to see Dean fall down his front steps into a big mud puddle. Not feeling an ounce of guilt for the other man he was about to start on his way when he heard him start to talk.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry ok? Damn it I love you and I don't want to push you away like everyone else. I'm so damn sorry. Please don't go I can't watch you walk away or maybe I will kill myself. You are the last good thing to happen to me. Ever since Sammy. Just don't go." Towards the end Dean was crying out and sobbing catching the attention of all the people roaming around the courtyard.

He turned around and saw how sincere Dean was. He could see the pain radiating from those green eyes and he knew that if he didn't say or do something that this world would lose one of the best souls to grace it.

Running back towards the mud puddle where Dean was still huddled he slid in next to him and brought the tear stained face to look him in his own, "Dean I love you too but you need to take care of yourself. I don't know what I would do without you either. Just please take care of yourself. You're working yourself to death and everyone here can see that except for you."

"I'll do whatever you ask just don't go. Please don't go." Dean quickly replied shaking his head and tears slipping from his eyes.

"I'm not going anywhere Dean. I won't go anywhere." Cas answered and confirmed his words with a quick kiss to Dean's lips, "Come on let's get you back. You have some resting to do."

**A/N: Reviews please? Even if it is to tell me how horrible this is. I want to hear from you!**


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